![]() Was bragging in a bar about having sexually conquered a number of “Kerensky broads.” He should have checked to see that it was a Wolf Clan bar.Failed to do the mental math when charging four enemies.Decided to test the altitude limits of his jump jets without paying attention to his fuel.The investigation remains open as to how that could have happened. As it turns out, he had no ammunition in his missile racks of his Archer. Got into a name-calling match with his armorer just before he went into battle.Drew a Square of Equals, just to be different, and was killed for his slight to Clan Ghost Bear tradition.Killed by _ in a bar-fight when he pulled a bottle out of his jugular, tossing it into _ and cutting his throat in the process. ![]() Last words – “We have them on the run!”.Then he became the largest LRM crater in the history of that world. Stopped moving in his ‘Mech and became the largest, stationary LRM and Arrow target known to mankind…for 20 seconds.His tactic of, “Let’s lure them in to point blank range,” proved to be incorrect.Last words – “They are only stupid Capellans – charge!”.Two tons of autocannon rounds left little to be recovered. Self-detonated his ammunition, forgetting that he did not have CASE.Killed in a bar-fight with _ when a bottle cut his jugular.All we have to do is stick their names in before each of these glorious deaths and we can chalk it up as a win!Įxample: Bob Roberts harbored the illusion that 28 centimeters of ice could support his BattleMech.Įxtra points if you realize this guys name was Bob – twice.įulfillment Options (Insert names where appropriate) Sure, it’s a sleazy way to address this, but that’s why you assigned it to me. I propose this “memorial wall to the dead,” describing all of the dead and how they died. That got me thinking – what a great way to deal with all of these canon characters! Their names are written on the wall along with how they died. As you know, in an upcoming piece of fiction, I have bar where dead MechWarriors are commemorated for the stupid ways they died. Let’s save it for the magazine (our new default answer to hard stuff). Example: “I want to be a Khan of Clan Jade Falcon, who is really a covert Clan Wolverine operative that is also a DEST agent with secret information on Omi Kurita’s love child with Victor.” Yeah, I have tried to craft that story but it caused a small brain hemorrhage. Some are easy, some are complicated to the point of absurdity. Per our meeting, we was discussed the need to address the seemingly tens-of-thousands of Kickstarter backers who opted for canon characters in the universe. ![]() ![]() Internal Memorandum to Catalyst BattleTech Staff This was my suggestion to address all of the people that opted in for the canon character option in the Kickstarter. In keeping with my tradition of April Fool’s BattleTech Pranks:īattleTech Products That Never Came To Market ![]()
0 Comments
Leave a Reply. |
Details
AuthorWrite something about yourself. No need to be fancy, just an overview. ArchivesCategories |